This diet and exercise plan is changing me. It’s changing me physically, it’s changing me emotionally and it’s changing me mentally.
It’s been almost a year now and quite a lot weight has dropped off, so much in fact that people are now starting to notice there is something different about me. Don’t get me wrong I am still a big girl, but to my friend and family I am looking smaller. And this is where things start to get a bit tricky.
Everyone is delighted for me, they are very interested in the changes I have made,asking what is making me stick to the diet this time and how good do I look now? Now I’m not sure if it’s because I perhaps carry my excess weight reasonably well or if it is difficult for people to guess just how heavy I really am (I am about halfway through to goal weight)but I am getting some strange comments about that being enough now you’ve lost enough weight, and you’ve done so well have a cake!. I am also receiving some lovely comments and am in danger of getting a bit carried away with myself being so fantastic all the time if I’m not careful (joke) although my head is getting bigger by the day. And this is the difficulty you have when you actually might just make it to the goal you have always wanted to ghetto.
I am now in the sabotage zone. I have passed all of my expectations and it is very scary to think that I might actually succeed for once. But we all know that I won’t succeed, I never have before and there are too many great things out there that I am missing out on like nights out with friends (proper old style carnage that takes 3 days to recover from), long lies on winter mornings when I should be at the gym. Takeaway treats because it’s been a hard week.
I know that one week in four I don’t get a weight loss and this is a perfect excuse to take it easy as I’m not going to lose this week anyway. It’s a very difficult thing to notice at the time but whether it’s self sabotage or by others, it can be hugely damaging and difficult to get out of.
Friends and family also sabotage you and it isn’t even done as a bad thing a lot of the time – they just don’t realise they are doing it. Anything from treating you to lunch or chocolate bars for a treat and sometimes even a comment can be enough to put you off. A lot of the self sabotage is about fear of actually succeeding. What will happen to me when I reach my goal? Will I change? Will people still like me?
How do you deal with sabotage? I think it depends on how you feel at the time. If you are focussed and on track the sabotage can be a motivator to spur you on and prove yourself and everyone else wrong. I think it’s normal to have doubts and to worry about the changes that are happening. You are changing all your old habits and this can be very unsettling. I was advised to surround myself with other people who are doing the same things and who have similar goals. This was a huge help – instead of going out eating and drinking you get yourself out for a run with people who know what you are going through.
Most of all just have belief in what you are doing, be clear with people about why you are working so hard to reach your goals, and use all your support systems to get you there.